GCW Friday Ignition 28th July 2017 RESULTS

(Written by Joe Wheeler, Edited By Kidd West. This weeks segments provided courtesy of Daniel Collins and Chiyoko Uzuki!)

The show kicks off with some heavy music, and the camera pans over to ringside. On the left, is the regular voice of GCW Ignition!

Nigel Alexander: Welcome everyone to GCW Ignition! I'm Nigel Alexander, and alongside me, is a man who certainly needs an introduction. Seriously, I don't know who you are.

: Call me Tim the Intern.

Alexander: Really? Tim the Intern?

Tim: I've been a wrestling fan all my life. This is my opportunity.

Alexander: ..okay. Well, folks, we have a stacked card for you tonight! The GCW Women's Champion Chiyoko Uzuki takes on the dangerous Wolfe in a non-title match!

Tim: This should be a cakewalk for Uzuki. I can't remember the last time Wolfe won a match.

Alexander: The self-proclaimed Greatest Canadian of All Time and the self-proclaimed GCW Canadian Heavyweight Champion Joe Wheeler puts his belt on the line in an open challenge!

Tim: It's not a real title. He just brought it into the promotion.

Alexander: Uh, and in our main event of the evening, the GCW Hardcore Championship is on the line! Daniel Collins defends against the daredevil, John Mathis!

Tim: Nobody is crazier than Johnny Boy. The guy thinks he has a chance. 'The Big Fellow' Daniel Collins might legitimately murder him tonight.

Alexander: ...

At this point, a man comes charging in front of the camera, and knocks Tim the Intern off his chair. He has wild hair, tassles all over the arms of his leather jacket, and he is wearing dark shades. He smiles a huge grin, with a good ol' fashioned lens flare coming off of a golden tooth.

: Awooooo~! Enough of that guy! I'm here for you Nigel! Just call me the Life of the Party! I'm the People's Choice, Bobby Noice!

Alexander: All right, Bobby! That's more like it! Let's get to the action!

Chiyoko Uzuki vs. Wolfe

This match should not have been as competitive as it was. Uzuki seemed lost at the beginning of the match. Casey Calhoun and Bill Pryce were nowhere to be found after some recent developments, while Daniel Collins was busy preparing for his big Hardcore Title defence at the end of the show. As a result, Wolfe came out strong, trying to get the better of Uzuki. After a few minutes of being on top, Wolfe made a mistake. Coming off the ropes, she charged right at Uzuki, who countered with a GLOMP! Wolfe was stunned. Uzuki followed up with an elbow drop, into a rebound moonsault which was all that was needed to get the three count.

The lights turn red as the titantron crackles with static. it fades into a dark room, the camera focusing on a smug Camber. "Chiyokooo..." She calls out. "Oh, Chiyoookooo~?"

"...Huh?!" The idol whips her head around to face the screen.

"Hmhmhm... Did you think you were finished with me?" She smiles. "Because, unfortunately, I’m not quite done with you." The Queen of Flames folds an arm, grasping at her chin in thought. "Now, I'm sure you’re busy trying to figure out where Bill is, considering he's vanished into thin air..."

"...Wait... Mr. Pryce?" Chiyoko clenches her fists at her chest with a determined frown. "Wh... What happened to Mr. Pryce...?" Her voice quivers, though she does her best to put on a brave face.

Camber feigns surprise. "Oh, you didn't know? I know. How, you ask?" She smiles a much more sinister grin. "Well, it's simple, Chiyoko... I've studied you quite well, and..." She looks aside and a line of torches illuminate the room. The light reveals Bill Pryce bound and gagged in a chair, hunched over and unconscious. Camber grabs him by the hair, showing. his face to the camera. "...Simply put, I know where Bill is."

"MR. PRYCE!" Chiyoko shrieks in horror. Camber simply laughs as the video fades into static. Terrified of the fate of her manager, Chiyoko rolls out of the ring, snatching her title belt and sprinting her way backstage.

Alexander: Not the most dominant victory from our Women's Champion, but she showed some heart tonight. The question is, can she figure out how to be on her own? We saw some struggles earlier this week from her camp, and who knows what will happen next?

Noice: Awoooo...~ Although I'm a big fan of Uzuki, Wolfe really brought it tonight. That girl might have a future! But back to the champ -- instinct really took over! We could be seeing a side of her that we haven't seen before!

Alexander: We go from one champion, to another, sort of. Joe Wheeler says he'll put his GCW Canadian Heavyweight Championship on the line against anyone!

Noice: Hang on, Nigel. Who is that coming to the ring?

Alexander: That's the same overweight dude from last week. What the hell?

Noice: At least his Hartford Whalers NHL jersey is a lot noicer.

"The Greatest Canadian of All Time" Joe Wheeler vs. John "The Maple Leaf" Schplonson
For the GCW Canadian Heavyweight Championship

Our last match wasn't for a title, and this one technically isn't either. The newcomer, Joe Wheeler issued his open challenge, which was accepted by the same terrible wrestler we saw last week. Wheeler was a bit different this time, focusing on kicks, rather than punches. The crowd counted along, until Wheeler got to 17, and that's when they stopped. China does not love Joe Wheeler. He dropped Schplonson with a sidekick, and rolled him up for the 1-2-3. Wheeler proceeded to celebrate as if he won an Olympic Gold Medal, embracing Titus Canby in the ring. Canby started announcing Wheeler as the winner, when his microphone cut out.

Alexander: It looks like GCW Brass might be tired of Wheeler's shenanigans!

Noice: Maybe! All I know is, God Bless Canada!

Alexander: Really? You're from Philadelphia.

Noice: Big fan of poutine, Nigel. Potine and Celine Dion.

Alexander: Moving on, it's time for our main event of the evening!

Backstage Segment

Chiyoko is still scurrying around backstage, frantically darting back and forth between GCW personnel. "H-Have you seen Mr. Pryce?" She asks hopefully. "The rose suit guy...? Or Camber?!" She's met with head shakes and various forms of no. "Ghhh...!" She whimpers, scampering to the next closest person she sees. "Um... Um...! You, um... Mr... Mr. One!" She runs over to an arriving Jensen, tugging lightly at his jacket. "Have you seen Camber? The fiery lady?" She looks up pleadingly. "Or a man in a rose suit?!"

 Jensen stares blankly."Are... those your parents?" He blinks. "Are you... lost?"

"N-No!" She stammers, flustered. "I work here! I have a title and-" She cuts herself off, shaking her head. "Th-that’s not important right now, have you seen a rose suit man or a fiery lady? Yes or no?!"

"Uhhh..." He shrugs. "I just got here, so..."

"Okay, so that’s a no!" Chiyoko immediately bolts from the man, refusing to waste time. Mr. Pryce was in danger, and every second counted! There had to be someone who saw them...!

"...Ah!" The idol spots another wrestler, leaning against a wall with his arms folded across his chest. She glances at the title around his waist. "Um... Mr. Tag Team Champion...!" She runs up, panting. He shoots her a glare.

"My name is Simon Cade."

"O-oh... Sorry, Mr. Cade..." Her frown deepens as she offers a quick, apologetic bow. "But... have you seen Camber? The fire lady? Or my manager, the guy in the rose suit?"

"...Psh." He looks away. "Do I look like I give a shit?"

"...Gh...!" Chiyoko winces, tears beginning to well up in her eyes. Why so heartless...? All she did was ask him a question...! "Wh... Why’d you have to be so mean?!" She snaps back, though her voice cracks from failing to hold back a sob. The last thing she needed to do was break down and cry. Not now, at least. She had to find Mr. Pryce...! Shaking her head, she quickly cups her hands over her face, stifling her tears as she runs off.

"Wait! Chiyoke! No need to make with the crying...!" A voice calls. El Masko rolls up in a wheelchair, his hands cupped around his mouth. ”Come back! El Masko will dry tears with hankering chief!" He frowns, glancing back at his fellow bodyguard, Daniel Collins. ”Daniel! El Masko will take care of idol! He will sooth the Chiyoke with joke!” He motions at his partner to leave. ”Daniel must go do match!” He insists, but Daniel doesn’t respond. "...Daniel?"

El Masko tries nudging Daniel, oblivious to the fact that he’s been glaring at Cade the entire time. His fists are clenched, the knuckles white with tension. There was no doubt he was on edge - he was a powder keg ready to explode and dispense justice on the man who retired his partner, El Masko. Cade stares back, unwavering, his expression unreadable. Only after a few more nudges from the luchador does Daniel tear his gaze away.

"What?" came his sharp reply.

"Daniel have match!" El Masko reiterates. "Go do match! El Masko will look after the Chiyoko!"

Daniel grunts, glancing in the direction Chiyoko took off in. He frowns, looking to El Masko before shooting another glare at Cade. Finally, he lets out a gruff sigh, reluctantly yielding to his comrade. ”...Fine.” He grunts, turning to leave. ”...Take care of her.” He mutters, running off for his match.


"The Big Fellow" Daniel Collins vs. "Johnny Boy" John Mathis
For the GCW Hardcore Championship

Roger Alan Wade's "If You're gonna Be Dumb, You Gotta be Tough" hit the PA system, and out walked the challenger for the gold. Johnny Boy was surrounded by his entourage -- it appeared that a few of them were vlogging. One was live on Facebook Live! Johnny Boy was bragging about how he was going to be the champ, and how his opponent could not keep up with his craziness.

Alexander: Johnny Boy thinks it's his time. He'll have to bring his A-game against the shorter, yet stronger, Daniel Collins!

Noice: Forget his height and strength, Nigel! This Big Fellow is more accomplished! His pedigree, man! Not the move. His actual pedigree! It's off the charts!

The crowd pops once "What A Wicked Gang Are We" by Streetlight Manifesto hits the PA system. "The Big Fellow" Daniel Collins walks out onto the stage, nodding toward the crowd. He may only stand 5'7", but the crowd knows he is legitimate. Around his waist is the GCW Hardcore Championship. As he enters the ring, Johnny Boy starts yelling at his entourage to go backstage! It looks like Johnny Boy wants to do this on his own!

Alexander: It’s time! The two men have locked up, and Collins immediately has the upper hand!

Noice: Don’t count out Johnny Boy! That daredevil has something up his sleeve!

Collins may be slightly smaller than Johnny Boy, but he is MUCH stronger. He immediately lifts him up, and drops him with a gorilla press. Mathis rolls out of the ring, and waits for his entourage to return. Each of them is back with a shopping cart, full of weapons! Johnny Boy smiles, only to see Collins charging at him with a clothesline. Collins exits the ring, and scares the entourage away. The shopping carts full of weapons remain.

Alexander: Johnny Boy thought he would have the upper hand, but now Collins can do whatever he wants!

Noice: Hey, look! Some of his entourage are still here! They’re filming the carnage, rather than helping their boy! Awoooo, what a crew.

Collins uses some of the basic weapons like kendo sticks, cookie sheets, and more just to do some damage. He starts looking around in the crowd, and smirks. He has an idea. He pulls a table from underneath the ring, and lays it on top of one of the carts. He takes Johnny Boy into the ring, and sets him up on the corner turnbuckle.

Alexander: This isn’t good.

Noice: It’s GREAT! He’s about to DIE!

Alexander: There he goes!

Noice: OUCH! OUUUUCH!

Collins had dragged Johnny Boy to his feet, and took his back. He launched Johnny Boy to the outside via extreme german suplex, sort of putting him through the table into the cart. Whether intentional or not, the move was enough to knock Johnny Boy out cold. Collins went to drag him into the ring, but the referee would not have anything to do with it. Knowing Johnny Boy could be seriously hurt, he stopped the match. Collins would not have to inflict any more pain. He was still the GCW Hardcore Champion.

Alexander: What a brutal finish to that match! Johnny Boy thought he had a brilliant idea, but wow. Nope.

Noice: What a great night of fights!

Alexander: Exactly! Chiyoko Uzuki survived being alone out here tonight, victorious in her match with Wolfe, Joe Wheeler continues to do what he does to prove he is the Canadian Heavyweight Champion, and we witnessed the dismantling of Johnny Boy, at the hands of the GCW Hardcore Champion, “The Big Fellow” Daniel Collins! That’s it for this week, but be sure to stick around for next week! On behalf of Bobby Noice, I am Nigel Alexander. Thanks for tuning in! It’s Global Championship Wrestling!